Outfoxing a Fox


How do you outfox a fox? I have to know, because one or more of those furry devils have made a nuisance of themselves at our house. I discovered the nuisance one morning last week when I started down the breezeway steps on my way to the carport. The sight made me to jump back like I had touched a high voltage line which jerked me out of my usual morning lethargic state. The object looked like a coiled-up snake. Upon further examination by my wife who can still read Line 5 on the DPS eye chart, it was found to be a pile of nuisance. Some might say that the kind of nuisance I found is considerably less dangerous than a ground rattler, but my guess is nobody would classify it as more appealing. The one good thing you can say about it. It won’t cause you to be sent to the ER if you step on it.


After restoring our breezeway step to a respectful state, we discussed the incident with our good neighbor across the street who knows more than we do about what’s going on in the neighborhood because he gets up early and sometimes takes his coffee in the swing on the front porch. He told us our mysterious discovery was the calling card of a red fox. He knows, because he has seen them in the woods behind his house and other places in our vicinity. They have also been taking rest stops in the carport of another neighbor.


So now, I’m desperate to find how to outfox a fox. Having lived he first decade or so of my life on farms, which some might say puts me at a terrible disadvantage regarding other things, I’ve known something about foxes all my life. There are red ones and gray ones. The fur from the grays brought a better price to those who rapped them, but I don’t know if it was because their fur was of better quality or they had better bathroom habits. Like mink and coons (East Texas term for raccoon), both reds and grays were prized catches for trappers in the past who earned a considerable amount of income trapping them. I suppose foxes in the old days didn’t pause on people’s carports and steps because they were too busy looking for something to eat and watching out for steel traps, the principal that has been known to keep people out of trouble.


Sometime we might l talk about the ways a trapper outfoxed a foxes them in order to catch one, but right now I’m more concerned with finding a way to prevent them from taking rest stops on our steps at night. As already indicated, our predicament is just another illustration of what happens when any creature has too much idle time on it hands as the result of easy living.